Friday, September 23, 2011

Wheel Nuts.

Driving along a congested road in an unmarked police car endeavouring to locate a suspect drug pusher Senior Constable Bertha Brunette senses the steering has become a bit wonky and suspects a punctured tyre. She pulls into a busy hotel carpark, leaps out walks around to the front of the police car and just as she suspected the passenger side tyre has a puncture.

Now in huff she storms off to the rear of the police car opens the boot lid, removes the jack and wheel brace, wanders back to the front and attempts to remove the Wheel Nuts without much luck. Near boiling point and ready to explode she jumps on the police car radio and screams for assistance claiming the wheel brace doesn't fit the Wheel Nuts.

With siren wailing Inspector Ian who was in the neighbourhood on other police matters turns up minutes later. It didn't take very long for Inspector Ian to realize what the problem is with the wheel brace. Like most cars these days they have plastic wheel trims which have fake Wheel Nuts that's why the wheel brace wouldn't fit because the real Wheel Nuts are behind the plastic wheel trim.

When Inspector Ian explained to Senior Constable Bertha Brunette about the plastic wheel trims and fake Wheel Nuts she was totally lost for words, turned red as a beetroot and didn't know whether to crawl and hide under the police car or the nearest rock with embarrassment.

Came across this story in the newspaper and once again my bizarre mind went into overdrive adding bits and pieces here and there. I reckon if you can't change a wheel on your own car you should learn how to. What about you can you change a wheel on your own car?.

(c) 2011 Windsmoke.


Cloudia said...


Aloha from Waikiki;

Comfort Spiral

> < } } ( ° >


Tempo said...

I can change any part in my car...and have. Just the same, I'd rather have someone else do it for me..

Bananazą®‡ said...

No sweat. Learn a new word *wheel brace* which is more correct and specific as in our country we called it spanner. Our locals in their own dialects pronounce it 'si-pa-na'. For us anything to do with nuts it either spanner or wrench haha.

Andrew said...

Takes me about five minutes to change a wheel, but I hate doing it as my hands get dirty.

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day CLOUDIA: Thank you for dropping by :-).

G' Day TEMPO: Me too but now like you i'd rather have someone else do it :-).

G' Day BANANAZ: I'm glad you've learned a new word :-).

G' Day ANDREW: A little bit of dirt never hurt anyone :-).

Beach Bum said...

Yeah, I can change my tire and in fact I once changed a flat tire for a lady who was on the side of the road looking very worried.

She claimed she knew nothing about tires so I tried to be nice and began to do it for her.

Damn lady started bugging the Hell out of me telling me how to change the tire. Making matter worse while I told her several times I had to be quick so I could get home she started looking all scared like I might try to jump her bones when I was rushing to put the flat tire and jack in her trunk.

Came away feeling slightly used and wishing I just drove past and gone on home.

FruitCake said...

Plastic nuts??? Fake nuts??? I thought I could change a tyre if I had to, but realise now that I had been wrong but now that I know to watch out for plastic nuts I think I could change a tyre if I had to... I think.
PS was soooo relieved to see the Senior Constable was a brunette but then, I guess that's why she's a senior. I think.

River said...

Change a wheel?

Isn't that what minions are for?

Mags118 said...

Hi Windsmoke,
I can change a tyre no worries, all I need is someone with a bit more strength than me to undo those stupid bolts. LOL.

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day BEACH BUM: I don't blame you for feeling used after being nagged the whole time :-).

G' Day FRUIT CAKE: Bertha Brunette has grown out of her Blonde phase :-).

G' Day RIVER: Haven't seen minions used in a long time, must make a note and use it where possible :-).

G' Day MAGS: Sometimes i have trouble undoing the wheel nuts because these days they are tightened with a air operated rattle gun :-).