Friday, March 04, 2011

A Bonza Jest: Squeaky Voice.

Gary Golfer is telling a yarn to a bunch of people and says, I'm having a terrible day on the golf course when out of the blue just as i'm about to tee off again i hear this Squeaky Voice say, use your three wood, gazing around i couldn't see anyone near by, again i hear the same Squeaky Voice say, use your three wood.

Peering into my tee box i discovered a tiny frog had camped out there telling me to use my three wood. Crazy as it may sound i did and to my surprise smashed that little white golf ball a good two hundred yards or more. At the next hole the tiny frog said to use a five iron i listened and ended up with my very first hole in one ever and made birdie on the rest of the holes it was the best game of golf ever thanks to the little frog.

In the evening i popped my little frog into the pocket of my shirt, wandered next door to the casino to play roulette my little frog told me in that Squeaky Voice which numbers to place my betting chips on and i won each and every time and made a small fortune. After a few hours had elapsed i was becoming tired so i called it a night wandered back to my hotel room placed my little frog in the tee box sitting on the wooden bedside chest of draws when suddenly the little frog says, in that Squeaky Voice "Kiss Me".

Gobsmacked i refused at first but thought what've i got to lose and planted a sloppy one on the little frog before my very eyes he turned into this gorgeous, well developed, underage, fifteen year old girl. That's the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me god your honour and members of the jury as to why a gorgeous, well developed, underage, fifteen year old girl ended up in my hotel room.

(c) 2011 Windsmoke.


Anonymous said...

We believe you Gary ...

Cloudia said...

aloha Gary
from Waikiki

Comfort Spiral



Beach Bum said...

If I was the judge I would fall off my chair laughing only to throw the book at him once I regained my dignity.

Great post!

Dave King said...

So, what's the problem?

River said...


Anonymous said...

Hi Windsmoke,
I love it, very well thought out joke. It must be the weekend for Golf jokes. :)

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day JANE HEALY, Millions wouldn't though :-).

G' Day CLOUDIA, Fantastic to hear from you :-).

G' Day BEACH BUM, I'd throw more than a book at him. Firstly i'd throw away the key to his goal cell, just for a starters :-).
G' Day DAVE KING, Depends what happened after :-).

G' Day RIVER, I'm glad you got a laugh out of this post :-).

G' Day MAGX2, Thank you for your generous comment it's much appreciated and valued :-).

Life Ramblings said...

you've such vivid imaginations.

Symdaddy said...

Good one!

Thanks for the chuckle!

(and for visiting

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day LIFE RAMBLINGS, I don't know where my imagination comes from most of the time :-).

G' Day SYMDADDY, Glad you got a chuckle as that's my aim to get as many people as possible to chuckle or smile :-).