Saturday, May 12, 2012

A Bonza Jest: White Collar Crime.

Everyone is seated in court room 13 in the Contention Court House waiting for the jury to return and deliver its verdict in the case against Daniel Dandelion whose a stockbroker and is on trial for fraud and insider trading.

After many hours of deliberation the jury have finally reached a verdict and are now rolling into court room 13 and have been seated in the jury box.

Judge Judith Juniper asks, How do you find the accused Daniel Dandelion on the charge of fraud?, guilty or not guilty?.

Rising from his seat is George Green the jury foreperson and replies, we the jury find the accused Daniel Dandelion guilty as charged your worship.

How do you find the accused on the charge of insider trading?, guilty or not guilty?.
Guilty as charged your worship.

Would the prisoner please rise and do you have anything to say?.
No your worship.
Very well i sentence you to 5 years in gaol with a minimum of 3 years in the Contention Prison.
Five hours later Daniel arrives at the Contention Prison in a cramped prison van and is hustled through the usual checks, changes into prison garb, then escorted by a prison guard to his shared prison cell where he will spend the next 3 years of his life.

Nervous, Daniel is shoved into his shared prison cell by the prison guard who in turn slams the cell door shut with a loud clang.
Lying on one of the two beds with his hands behind his head is Ralph Rose. A scruffy looking fella covered in tatts with a mean scar face and balding head.

So what are you in for mate?, asks Daniel.
Just like you i'm in here for a White Collar Crime too, replies Ralph.
I'm in here for fraud and insider trading of which i'm innocent.
Yep, this place is full of innocent people.
What type of White Collar Crime are you convicted of?.
Nothing classy as you, i just tortured and bumped off two paedophile men of the cloth who molested and abused me when i was a little tacker for many, many years while in their care.
They got what they deserved is that what your saying?.
Absolutely spot on cobber.

(c) 2012 Windsmoke.       

16 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

Bless his mean heart Ralph was a victim of white collar crime. Him and too many others. I don't approve of his actions but I understand them. I cannot understand the actions of the men of the cloth.

River said...

This reminded me of The Shawshank Redemption, a great movie.
I garee it's wrong to murder someone, but Ralph did a good thing removing those men of the cloth from this world.

Dave King said...

Mmm, gives a whole new meaning to the phrase, doesn't it? Your best yet, by a mile.

Anonymous said...

Two people very close to me were victims of paedophile abuse - I don't agree with the death sentence, but 5 years (out in 2.5) is nothing.

Thoughtful post.

Anonymous said...

Hi Windsmoke,
Very good, I like the way you have done this.

Commander Zaius said...

A stockbroker being convicted of something? Except for the very rare scapegoat here in America the very idea is science fiction.

Joanne Noragon said...

I was so busy looking for the end I had to read the last paragraph twice to find the other white collar. Shame on me. Well done.

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day THE ELEPHANTS CHILD: Revenge is a very strong emotion indeed :-).

G' Day RIVER: I reckon a lot more should be done to remove these disgusting people from this world :-).

G' Day DAVE: Thank you. Yes, it does give a different meaning to the phrase :-).

G' Day JANE: That's very sad about your friends being victims of these disgusting people :-).

G' Day MAGS: Thanks for saying so its much appreciated indeed :-).

G' Day BEACH: I reckon stockbrokers are definitely shifty and shady characters indeed :-).

G' Day JOANNE: Yes, shame on you, on the other hand i'm glad you liked it :-).

Ygraine said...

Yep! Certainly got what they deserved.
Men of the cloth should be exemplary, so to abuse the trust put in them is worthy of the death penalty.

Bravo Windsmoke!!

PerthDailyPhoto said...

Well that was an unexpected ending, deep Windsmoke!

momto8 said...

no winners here.

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day YGRAINE: I reckon men of the cloth just can't be trusted :-).

G' Day GRACE: That's good to know :-).

G' Day ANNMARIE: Exactly! :-).

LifeRamblings said...

A very thought-provoking ending.

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day LIFE RAMBLINGS: Both crimes are just as bad as each other :-).

FruitCake said...

White collar crime. I like it. Excellent story. Rooly excellent.

Windsmoke. said...

G' Day FRUIT CAKE: I'm stoked you rooly thought so :-).